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托福独立写作,求批改!谢谢!题目:Aftertheycompletetheiruniversitystudies,somestudentsliveintheirhometowns.Othersliveindifferenttownsandcities.Whichdoyouthinkisbetter?Givereasonsforyouranswer.正文:Afterth
更新时间: 2025-08-29 16:01:19
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问题描述:

托福独立写作,求批改!谢谢!

题目:

Aftertheycompletetheiruniversitystudies,somestudentsliveintheirhometowns.Othersliveindifferenttownsandcities.Whichdoyouthinkisbetter?Givereasonsforyouranswer.

正文:

Aftertheycompletetheiruniversitystudies,somestudentsprefertoliveintheirhometownswhileotherschoosetoliveindifferenttownsorcities.Everybodyhashisownreasonsforhispreference.

Aftermygraduation,Iwillgobackandliveinmyhomecity.Ihavemadethisdecisionbecauseofthefollowingreasons.

Firstly,myhomecityisabigcitythatcanofferalot.Thereareplentyofopportunitiesforwork,manybiglibrariesforstudies,severaldifferrentmusiumsforvisit,andnumerouscinemas,theatersandcentersforentertainment.WhenIgobackthere,IwillhavenodifficultyinfindingajobsuitableformeandIcanmakeuseofallthefacilitiesavailablethere.

Secondly,ifIgobacktomyhomecity,Icanlookaftermyparents.ItakethisintoconsiderationbecauseIamtheironlychildandtheyarenowweakandgettingoninage.IfIliveinthesamecitywiththem,Icanvisitthemveryoftenandhelpthemwheneveritisnecessary.

Thirdly,ifIliveinmyhomecity,Iwillhavealotoffriends,schoolmatesandrelativestovisitandtoturntoforhelpwhenIneed.Ofcourse,IcouldgetacquaintedwithmanypeopleandmakemanyfriendsifIweretogotoliveinastrangeplace,butthattakestime.IfIgobacktomyhomecity,everybodywillbewaitingformeandIwillbeabletosettledowncomfortablywithoutanytroubleandwasteoftime.

Inshort,mychoiseisbasedonacarefulconsiderationofmyhomecityandmyfamily.Ithinkitisabetterorsensiblechoice;inacertainsense,itisamust.

陈铁军回答:
  写得不错,很详尽.但我觉得有些跑题.题目是问你个人对此问题的看法,不是你个人选择.试着写了一篇如下:Aftercompletionofuniversitystudy,somestudentschoosetoliveintheirhometowns,whileotherschooset...
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